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UpGhana Forum / Jokes / Jet Li Nominates Ghanaian Singer, Kwame Asante For Tai Chi Master 2! (1 Post | 573 Views)
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Jet Li Nominates Ghanaian Singer, Kwame Asante For Tai Chi Master 2! by EA524(m) : 11:13 pm On Jun 05
Seasoned actor, Jet Li, who needs no description, on the 21st of April 2016, revealed to the media at his Hong Kong residence that Ghanaian gospel singer Kwame Asante will be the Co-Lead actor for Tai Chi Master 2! The world has been anticipating for the part two of this movie ever since the first part was launched years ago.
The world at large was amazed as Jet Li overlooked martial art experts such as Jackie Chan, Michael Jai White, Donnie Yen, Jason Statham etc, to pick an urban gospel artiste all the way in West Africa, Ghana!
Jet Li explained:
“The world only see an unknown singer but I see a bone crusher. You see, I initially wanted to do the part 2 of this movie with Michael Jai White but I was surfing the internet one midnight when I saw some dude on Facebook with a haircut and a beard that is amazingly perfect for Tai Chi Master!
Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t choose him based on the hair cut but when I saw that beautifully crafted head and I meditated, I found out he is very capable of breaking bricks.
As you saw in the part one, one of our intensive training in the “Two Shaolin Temple” was breaking of bricks with heads by the pupils.
Those bricks were very light but in the part two, we want to take things a step further with very heavy bricks and we believe we can achieve that real head banging 3D experience with Kwame Asante.
Aside all these, I see a fighter in him.
I see a warrior when I look in his eyes!
I will do with Kwame what Jackie did with Jaden Smith in Karate Kid. I will do with Kwame what Idris Elba did with Abraham Attah!”
Jet Li continued:
“In his first training we will drop 7 pieces of coconut on his head from the Coconut Tree.
He must not scream, he must not shake, he must not whisper a word.
We believe Kwame can handle this after we take him through the head boiling numbing routine.
In this routine, what we normally do is we dip your head in boiling Sobolo as they call it in Ghana for one hour.
After this process you’ll feel no pain and your head will sparkle as bright as the galaxies.
However, it is not everyone in this world that can go through this process; Kwame was chosen because the kung fu ‘gods’ nominated him.
His earnings for this role will be 5 million dollars after the successful worldwide launch.”
Kwame Asante, the How You Love Me hit maker, was overwhelmed when this news broke in.
He said; “what a wow, I can’t believe this, I am ready!” According to our sources in Hollywood, Kwame has already put pen to paper.
Congratulations to Kwame Asante for being the chosen one, Jet Li added.
“One more thing, the reason why we have been unable to come up with Tai Chi Master 2 after all these years is because since 1993 after the movie was released, every person we nominated for the Part 2 dropped dead after the first coconut was dropped on their heads!
People have been dying since 1993 and we hope Kwame will be our last stop since I am aging and need to make the part 2 before I am bed ridden.
Young guys nowadays are not strong because they eat too much indomie (instant noodles), but in Kwame we see a different and sacred soul!”
Reports coming in indicates Kwame Asante upon hearing this collapsed and was rushed to the 37 Military hospital.
Doctors claim Kwame now doesn’t want to be part of this as he keeps screaming “no, no, no, Tai Chi!”, on his bed.
Unfortunately, Jet Li and his crew are waiting at the car park of the hospital to wisk Kwame Asante to the Shaolin Temple to start his training as Kwame has already put pen to paper.
There is a large crowd gathered at the entrance of the hospital as every Tom, d!ck and Harry wants to catch a glimpse of Jet Li.
Tai Chi Master 1 lead actors were Jet Li and Chin Siu-hou who looks very much like Jet Li to the extent that many thought Jet Li performed both roles.
In the part 2, Kwame will be the evil black brother of Jet Li.
Jet Li has starred in many movies like The One, Fist of Legend, Fong Sai-Yuk, The Legend, Once upon a time in China, Fearless, Hero, Hitman, Shaolin Temple, Romeo must die, Lethal weapon 4, My Father is a hero, among many others.
Be encouraged Kwame, you can do it.
Ghana is behind you!
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